In my last post I wrote about my battle with my personal hell. I’m proud of myself that I have learned how to deal with this inner anxiety and emotion. I know it will always be a part of my life, so I choose to acknowledge it and no longer bottle it and ignore. Twenty something years of that was a pretty good litmus test, it really doesn’t work you could say. This is a repetitive statement but I wanna run it home. I share this blog with all to illustrate that it is possible to deal with brain chemistry without medication. I truly hope this blog will give someone hope.

I always have said that there has been a constant in my life during all the trials; golf. The other day I realized where my favorite golf place is in the world. It’s probably not what you are thinking. I’ve played in some of the most beautiful locations that you can imagine. The setting sun at Seven Canyons in Sedona Arizona is not to be missed. Forrest Highlands in Flagstaff Arizona offers some of the most stunning golf scapes you will ever see. The dew swept mornings at Pumpkin Ridge in Oregon are so memorable, the smell of that day remains with me. I’ve stood on the 16th tee at Cypress Point  with the Pacific’s breeze on my face, some consider this a definite golf mecca. There are so many more to list and all equally unique and beautiful and I have been very blessed to step foot on them but they are not my sanctuary.


Public golf courses and practice facilities usually always have them, with a few exceptions. A simple practice chipping green is the holiest of places I speak of. A green, surrounding rough, a few holes cut and possibly a bunker; that’s it. I have been visiting these places for as long as I can remember. They have a relaxing medicinal effect on me. All you need is a couple balls, a wedge or two and an imagination. Throughout all the hardships that I have self inflicted on this journey, I always go back. It’s amazing that I always meander onto a good one too. Ranges can be packed with people desperately trying to harness “the way.” Golf courses are booked solid and always overpriced. The practice chipping green remains pure, a place for quiet reflection. It will possibly sound blasphemous to some of you, but this is where I talk to God. I usually don’t speak of religion, church or politics because of the sensitive nature but tonight I make exception. This is my church. I’m not only honing a short game that is pretty decent but pure meditation comes over me. On the outside looking at me, you would just think I’m another golfer, killing time on a meaningless day chipping a few nuggets. You would be wrong. I have so much more to say on this topic but you’ll have to wait.

Coming soon; the search for a subculture that I could belong too, I mentioned hippy culture recently but I think I might not fit in…